09-24-2007 06:27 AM
I may need a few of these today.
"They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
"I wasn't sleeping, I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands."
"I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"
"Amen"
"This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."
"Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"
"I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress."
"This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
"Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"
"Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
09-24-2007 06:31 AM
Q: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen.
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: What's the shortcut for Undo?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I create a New Document window?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I set the background and foreground to the same color?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: What is the proper procedure for rebooting my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I delete a document on my Etch-A-Sketch?
A: Pick it up and shake it.
Q: How do I save my Etch-A-Sketch document?
A: Don't shake it.
09-24-2007 10:08 AM - edited 09-24-2007 10:08 AM
@Ed Dickens wrote:
I may need a few of these today: Top ten excuses for falling asleep at your desk.
How about "the program is compiling..." 🙂 (wouldnt work for LabView tough ).
CC, we'll wait to see cheerfull photos from the asian expedition!
Message Edited by Gabi1 on 09-24-2007 05:09 PM
09-24-2007 11:16 AM
Wish I had some good jokes to share..
Hope you're doing better, buddy, and hopping back to health.. 🙂
Wonder if hundered of smiley faces would cheer you up...??
😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂 😄 😄 😄 🙂 🙂 🙂
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09-24-2007 12:23 PM
The Frog and the Engineer
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I`ll turn into a beautiful princess".
He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week."
The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I`ll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want."
Again the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I`ve told you I`m a beautiful princess, that I`ll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. Why won`t you kiss me?"
The engineer said, "Look I`m an engineer. I don`t have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that`s cool."
09-24-2007 03:38 PM
09-24-2007 04:02 PM
09-24-2007 05:33 PM
09-24-2007 09:51 PM
Altenbach is onto something!!
😄 🙂 🙂 😉 🙂 😄
09-25-2007 10:26 AM
Not a joke, but a funny quote from a private board on the subject of children:
"If I remember well, these little human beings have the bad habit to ask for food at any time during the night. That was one of the worst periods in my life, since my wife never managed to leave our bed without waking me up..."
Unfortunately, that quote is from CC himself, so I don't know how much it will help to make him laugh, but at least it can make the rest of us laugh.